Im calling because my girlfriend and I never fight usually... We just recently got engaged, and now were starting to fight over the wedding planning. Its getting to the point where Im just agreeing with everything she says, just so shell stop. What should I do? I dont want a wedding, but I dont like anything that weve planned.
Thank you. Wooooow. You know what I mean? I do know what you mean. Its like, the thing about weddings is its like collaborating on a work project.
(Dannielle: Right.) Right? Like, its like you, in normal life, you and your future wife probably dont work on things like that. You know? Its like she does her thing, you do your thing. But you dont have to, like, actually create an event together. I dont think that you should be backing down for everything because youll just end up resenting your...
Beyonce. You know what I mean? You are saying, I dont want to deal with the fighting so Im backing down to avoid the issue. But as with anything else in life, it doesnt work. (Dannielle: Yeah.) It actually hurts way more than it helps when you back down on somebody elses wishes.
So, I think you need to have a sit down conversation, and it needs to not be like in the middle of doing a wedding thing. Im going to suggest holding wedding forum meetings. You can call them that, or you can call them, like, fun time with ice and wedding talks. Oh, thats better.
Or whatever. Whatever, you know, suits your fancy. You sit down, and the point of the meeting isnt to plan anything, right? Youre not going to, like, try to check off lists, or like write out invitations, or whatever the hell youre doing. Youre just going to check in with each other on the plans that youve made the week prior, and that you are planning to make the week coming up, and talk about them in a calm, like, cool situation where you both hear each other out.
I also think this is a very good map for any fight. Because you...I mean, if youre fighting and youre both on opposite sides of the argument or whatever, you can sit down and... [Car Honking] So rude. So, sitting down and saying this is my point of view, this is your point of view, worst case scenario, what could happen? Go with a compromise that makes no sense.
[Laughing] Like, you know, she wants it at city hall, and you want a giant wedding at a church. Compromise that makes no sense. Lets do it in a jump castle and go from there. Fantastic compromise.
What are other compromises under jump castle? Also, when you are done making all of your compromises, and perhaps both of you are feeling excited about some and a little underwhelmed with others, I need you to remember something. The reason most of us get married, those of us who get married, this is why we do it. Because we want to, like, say that we love somebody else in the presence of people who mean the world to us. I can promise you that when you get to your wedding day, you are not going to give a flying fuck if the napkins are green and you wanted them to be blue.
You arent even going to touch a napkin. Youll literally never see a napkin. You wont see a napkin. So like remember that, remember what the day is about.
When I went into my wedding, my goal was that all of my guests had a really good ass time. That was it. None of the colors mattered. None of it mattered.
It was just I want everybody to have fun. So make sure theres drinks, and make sure theres food. Yeah, I had a lot of fun. Oh, and good music.
Have Dannielle do your playlist. Yeah, thank you! She did mine. I did a great job. Good luck to you both.
[Singing] Happy trails to you. Bye! [Music Playing: Suzanne Vega Toms Diner] Lip Syncing: I am thinking of your voice. Doo doo doo doo doo da doo doo da da doo doo da da doo doo [Repeating] [Car Honking] I mean. Hes probably stuck behind a...
[Car Honking] Person outside yelling: What do you want me to do? Im fuckin... .

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